ty-get over it!

awww danny ur sweet. lol. well tomorrow is halloween and i hope my superman can go with us and if he cant then ill be so sad. Well nothing really new except i still havent told anthony cuz im nervous and aaron is hanging all over ryder which is supposed to make me jealous apparently but to be honest i dont have feelings for him. I adore him as a friend but i dont give a freak bout what he does or who he hooks up with so get over it!Well im going to go and write my paper only cuz my superman told me to. so ill tell you on wednesday all the juicy details of my halloween night. Oh and i want the cd paramore so bad! They rock and i just love her voice so thats my new goal is to obtain that as my own possesion.

world peace lol

I am so happy right now. i mean i have been able to spend time with Danny and i told him alot of things that i thought would freak him out but i guess they didnt so i am happy. I didnt tell him im in love with him or anything like that i just told him how i felt i was perceived by his friends. I am so tired of school already. Its funny how much i look foreward to it and then once its here i am already done with it. I feel that it is my prison and that no matter what i do i will never be free. I mean if you think bout it you go to preschool to prepare for regular schools and then you go to elementary to prepare for jr high and thenyou go to junior high to prepare for hihschool and then you go to highschool to prepare for college and all this schooling was to prepare you for living in the real world. Mean while you have been living in the real world. Your leaning never stops because you go to work and learn new things there or you learn from the people you surround yourself with. You never learn everything and you never will because the knowledge is infinite and many people get upset because they cant come to the realization that you will never stop learning and you will never know anything. Is it better to know everything or not? I dont think i would ever want to know because i would just be depressed. There is so much good but for the good there are ten more bad things. It makes me sad and what makes it worse is the fact that i will never ever be able to help everyone. I want to so bad. My day is only good when i can talk to my superman and make someone, a random person just smile. I think its an incredible feeling. Kind of corny i know but overall... i think it would help alot. Yeah if i could have just one thing and my expense i would want world peace. No i am not a beauty pagent queen or anything like that. I am not the prettiest or the smartest or the thinnest or the one with most talent. I am only a simple girl with a very complex wish. Well i guess ill go and call my superman now. I mean i made a lot of people smile today and he is the one that can always make me smile. I adore him so much and i just wish he knew that. Well ill write tomorrow i think! luv ya`s xoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo

Danny

Ok so after less then a week of knowing one another we are already together. I adore him because he just so great. I love the way i can be a kid with him and the way he kisses me. he is a pretty dang good kisser. He stood up for me today when a guy asked him if i was his gf and he said yes and the stupid .... guy said that i was the reason was society had fallen and i was going to corrupt him. He was saying women were the reasons for the world ending. I mean he knows pointless things that are on jeapordy. Sorry bout my spelling. I am so happy that everyday i get to see him or talk to him it just gets better. i dont want to tell him that cause he could take it the wrong way. I mean he could think i am way to clingy or just a freak...lol i mean i am a bit weird considering when he asked me if i would eat a sandwhich that he made with his feet i asked if his feet were clean. I know strange. Lately i have just been so tired and i dont know why. I am upset with my mother becuase she was rude and disrespectful. I need to call her tomorrow. I have just been so mad and confused cuz i dont know how to help her grieve. It seems that when i even attempt to help her she bites my head off or puts me through a major guilt trip. i am done with that crap and i just cant take it. You know what i mean? I have my own problems. On top of all that "Jonny" is telling me there is no reason for him to be here and i am a friend but he could live without me. I mean it hurts me. i wish it didnt but it does. I get upset with him alot but i still do care bout him despite what he may think or what others think. I cant dye my hair tonight cause i have been to busy and i havent written in a while so i decided to do this and than my hw. Well i should go do that... tomorrows a danny day so the faster i finish everything the faster ill be able to see him and have a great day. The thought of seeing him makes me happy and when he asks me is it weird that i already miss you i just say no cause im already missing you! love ya`s xoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo

i am so happy right now

Ok so "homecoming" was intresting. i really enjoyed it, but the more i thought bout it the more i decided that Aaron is just a friend. I mean he is really nice in all but he never wants to do anything and i think during the time i was making the plans i talked to his mother more than him. i mean i think that is kind of lame but at the same time i met a really nice lady. his parents are so adorable. I am sooo excited for wednesday cuz i get to see the cutest guy ever. i mean he is so nice, funny,sweet, couteous, and hott. Dont tell anyone but i adore him more than any other guy. i mean the more i talk to him the more i just want to see him and hold his hand. i love his sweet little kisses and how aggressive he can be. He doesnt mind my play fighting and he doesnt mind anything else i do. he is trying to learn frech from a book i gave him and i love listening to him. Everytime he opens his laugh or smile i just get so happy. he calls me on his break and that just always brightens up my day. I mean today i was extremely upset because my mom called my friend and was asking inappropriate questions. It was rude and i did get upset. i know i havent been calling but i just never know what to say anymore. I have no idea how to make her feel better now that she is going through hard times and i just cant make her smile anymore. I mena i know she is going through hard times but they are adult issues and to be honest i try my best to give adult advice but i cant anymore. i feel like i am missing out on my own childhood and my own dilemas because i am always worrying bout her. Well i dont know what else to do. Oh well i guess. I am just trying not to think bout it and stay focused on the fact that DANNY IS COMING! yeah i know im lame but i have a huge crush on him cuz again the more i talk to him the more i like him. u know what i mean. Well anthony is getting mad at me for stupid crap right now and i guess he is going to call me back even though at this point i just dont want to talk to him. Seriously he is starting to be a lil clingy. I mena i adore him but i think we might be better as friends as well. i am scared to tell him cuz i know he is going to get so pissed off. well... i wont lie. when i care bout ppl there is no need to lie. There are a very select handful of ppl idont lie to about anything and i know i can always talk to them. well gtg! luv ya`s xoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo

i am so happy right now

Ok so "homecoming" was intresting. i really enjoyed it, but the more i thought bout it the more i decided that Aaron is just a friend. I mean he is really nice in all but he never wants to do anything and i think during the time i was making the plans i talked to his mother more than him. i mean i think that is kind of lame but at the same time i met a really nice lady. his parents are so adorable. I am sooo excited for wednesday cuz i get to see the cutest guy ever. i mean he is so nice, funny,sweet, couteous, and hott. Dont tell anyone but i adore him more than any other guy. i mean the more i talk to him the more i just want to see him and hold his hand. i love his sweet little kisses and how aggressive he can be. He doesnt mind my play fighting and he doesnt mind anything else i do. he is trying to learn frech from a book i gave him and i love listening to him. Everytime he opens his laugh or smile i just get so happy. he calls me on his break and that just always brightens up my day. I mean today i was extremely upset because my mom called my friend and was asking inappropriate questions. It was rude and i did get upset. i know i havent been calling but i just never know what to say anymore. I have no idea how to make her feel better now that she is going through hard times and i just cant make her smile anymore. I mena i know she is going through hard times but they are adult issues and to be honest i try my best to give adult advice but i cant anymore. i feel like i am missing out on my own childhood and my own dilemas because i am always worrying bout her. Well i dont know what else to do. Oh well i guess. I am just trying not to think bout it and stay focused on the fact that DANNY IS COMING! yeah i know im lame but i have a huge crush on him cuz again the more i talk to him the more i like him. u know what i mean. Well anthony is getting mad at me for stupid crap right now and i guess he is going to call me back even though at this point i just dont want to talk to him. Seriously he is starting to be a lil clingy. I mena i adore him but i think we might be better as friends as well. i am scared to tell him cuz i know he is going to get so pissed off. well... i wont lie. when i care bout ppl there is no need to lie. There are a very select handful of ppl idont lie to about anything and i know i can always talk to them. well gtg! luv ya`s xoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo

wus up

Dani is cool and we have been talking for a while. I have been super busy. Dani and i have been talking bout movies which i ruined for him. He loves history and i love english. I broke it. He just laughed at me for lieing to him. He lies a lot. lol. We are going friday to the movies. we are going to see the grudge 2. he has a nephew. Its awesome. SO i am kind of beginign to like this guy but i have mixed feelings because i like aaron and anthony too. Its really hectic and chaotic... well at least to me cuz im living in the drama. i know i am putting myself in this posistion but i guess its ok. I mean yeah i have 3 lovers. lol. I am upset with paul because f the whole homecoming thing and i am sure as hell happy that im going with aaron and not paul. i deserve to be treated right. so i get jealous over my friend eric and zac when they are flirting with other girls but i shouldnt cuz i dont like them... or do i? i seriously dont know and at this point i dont really care. I mean its nothing but... well i just wont worry bout it right now cuz i have enough on my plate considering school, swim aiding, boys, family, and friends. I dont really need to deal with that and i wont. I have enough. yay me! i am finding my limits. my x aaron is very proud of me cuz im finally learning to say no. Well i am kind of tired so im going to head out. before i do i thought of something intresting. If you ever have those days when you dont know what to pray i about, i figured it out. I was singing in front of my mirror songs that i was making up like a dork and i figured out that i should... Pray for the loved, pray for the lost, pray for the forgotten, and pray for the broken. so yeah. thats all i have4 for today. when i have tons of time i will write a long ass thing bout all the juicy details but until then this will do. love yas xoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo

wow

Homecoming is coming up and i know am on my fourth date. This is the one. He just recently broke up with his ex but i dont know if he still has feelings for her. I really like him. His name is Aaron the new and improved mind you. I really like this guy and i hope he likes me or sees potential. i want to go to Knotts scary farm. I got jealous of my friend Angel because she was all over eric though she has a bf.It has been hectic and i have been a lil low. I cant smile all the time but thanks to the most important ppl in my life i have been able to make it through. I love AMber and Lissa. Well i need to go and try to get some np which is points on my secret nerdy sight. Oh and i love Paul! ssshhhh but dont say anything!